Underneath My Dashiki

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It’s trendy, its rareness, its beauty,

Its identity, its brightness, its design, its colors – RAINBOW indeed!!

A Letter Of Confession:

It’s trendy, its rareness, its beauty,

Its identity, its brightness, its design, its colors – RAINBOW indeed!!!

I owned one to identify with culture and then I owned one to communicate i acknowledge and accept the race, and then I owned one because of its beautiful fabric…

But what lies underneath –The truth:

That the day my deep mind called you to Sweetness, my heart was battling with bitterness and because I felt compelled to serve you than myself, in my attempt, I equally acquired healing from my own write-up?

Or that I mentioned we hold our wheel together and I was actually holding my own spike in my hand ready to poke in on my own tires but the voice that says I serve you, led me to you before me, and there I got my own re-directions?

Or that on that day I asked you to shiz the niz” was actually my day of confusion and I  needed your validation, trying to figure out what and who I actually was, and what the true nature of my character was, but when by my commitment to you I started writing, I discovered exactly in my prose the answer I had been searching for?

And that on this day when I said I loved men, I actually wanted to hate them but then after a brief great session from a man in my life I decided otherwise and it was at that same moment that I felt compelled to share with you, that in it I gained total understanding and conviction?

Or that until the day I fell victim of it, I was actually condescending myself. I have looked at so many people and saw little vibration or motivation or potential until they shocked me and they always do but I never learn. And that the day the tables turned and I had my own strength and intellect questioned, was the actual moment I seemed to remember we are all equals and basic mostly to keep my esteem in check; Almost selfish – except only I shared it with you and then I became a believer?

And do you know beneath the fanciness is a weirdo and a nerd; that I crave to sit home, knit, bake, cook and read that book, travel, parade in lifestyle, see the wonders of the world than party the night out and yet i have been ashamed and that as I now put it down, I released myself from my own prison? That I run away constantly from my calling to be of Service that even now my ‘flee-buttons’ are alert but what has kept me glued is remembering what always brought me back – He who gave me to you and you to me?

And now I fear to admit how I fear the exposure that comes with my calling and how dependable I am on my alter-ego but the beauty and the sincerity and the Joy involved in all of my writing gives me assurance and certainty that what is ahead can be handled?

My confessions, my dashiki underneath!!

But then YOU…

How deep is your believe in those RAINBOW colours? Do you think what you see is what you believe? Or do you think what you say is what you believe? Or do you do what you believe should be done?

OR

Underneath that Dashiki, what do you HIDE, Passionistas?

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